The Final Solution?

Read about this on Reason today.  Well, it seems the bigots can't get enough of stomping on gay people.  Since most of the people that don't like gays are not the most intelligent people in the world (read: Jerry Falwell), they are now trying to prohibit gay people from adopting children. 

 

Why are they doing this?  Who knows.  Statistics show that children raised by gay people tend to have the same chances of being gay as the rest of the population (obviously, since its not like you choose it).  Of course, the religious right doesn't understand this.  They think that having gay people adopt kids makes the kids gay.  So maybe if we don't let them "have" children, we will eliminate them, kind of like Hitler's "Final Solution" but a little less harsh, since we aren't killing them...yet.

 

The real hypocrisy is that the religious right hates abortion.  They say that adoption is a very good alternative, which I think everyone agrees with.  But many gay people adopt children who are physically or mentally disabled, which most couples avoid like a sick chicken.  These children just end up in foster homes, orphanages, or other undesirable locations.  Where do you think the kids would rather be? 

 

However, let's assume that we want to keep kids out of households that may cause the kids to be... whacky (for lack of a better word), later on.  I've introduced some rules that would lead to "mainstream" kids.

 

1. No children can be adopted by anyone with a below average (<100) IQ

2. No children can be adopted by anyone who attends a non-majority religious services (i.e. no Jews, muslims, hindus, etc.)

3. No children can be adopted by anyone without a college degree

4. No children can be adopted by anyone who has ever been or known a member of a fringe political group

5. No children can be adopted by anyone who was not born a US citizen

6. No children can be adopted by anyone who is married to, dated, or is friends with people of a different race

7. No children can be adopted by anyone who has committed any type of crime, including getting a speeding ticket (bad driving could endanger the child, or cause them to speed when they grow up)

8. No children can be adopted by someone who was fathered by or adopted by any of 1-7.

 

Now that we've taken care of all of the bad parents, we're left with about... 10 good ones, at best.  So, what do we do with the millions of children without parents?